The options on the Referendum ballot on our membership of the EU to
c) Shake it all about
Big thanks to Jim for this one….
The options on the Referendum ballot on our membership of the EU to
Now that all the recent By-election and County Council elections are over, and grunting and groaning between the so-called major parties – You will be pleased to know that we still have three Councillors:
Howling ‘Laud’ Hope in the Fleet Town Council.
Mad Mike Young on the Isle of Sheppey Council.
Nick the’Flying Brick’ in the Kirk Ireton Parish Council!
Its official, the Fleet Town Council, which has Our Leader as a member, is to name a road after him. ‘Hope Walk’ is well under construction and should be completed within the next four months. Champagne party on the opening day? Why not!?!
He has been suggesting for some time that Fleet needs a top budget price hotel and one is now under construction. ‘Premier Inn’ will be opening shortly opposite the ‘Links’ where we have previously held party conferences. It seems quite fitting that ‘Hope Walk’ is next door.
Our Illustrious Leader will be in the West Country from Thurs 27th of June to Sun the 7th of July. He has been invited back to Ashburton to officiate in the Towns Carnival week where he will open the Carnival Fete on Sat 29th June as guest of honour. He will visit various events thoughout the week, take part in the Carnival parade, and be part of the judging committee on Saturday the 6th of July.
He feels honoured to be involved as this is the place where ‘The Official Monster Raving Loony Party’ first got off of the ground at the ‘Golden Lion Hotel. It is also the place where the Loony Party had their greatest political success when Howling Laud became a Town Councillor for 13 years, Town Mayor, Chairman of the Council and a Lord of the Borough!
Asburton is a lovely place, if you live near, or are down that way during this period, you will be more than welcome to come and join in, but make sure that your in the right mood for a laugh.
Howling will also be the guest of honour in his own local town of Fleet in Hampshire at the annual Fleet Dog Show at Calthorpe Park on Saturday 27th July. ‘Bark in the Park’ has been going a couple of years now and is gaining in popularity each time. This is quite fitting, as it was the Loony Party led by Lord Sutch that was instrumental in getting the ‘Passport for Pets’ law on the statute books! Once again all are welcome, if your bringing your Boxers make sure they leave their gloves at home!
Our Leader & Harriet Harman in South Shields
So soon after the ‘Eastleigh’ By-election in February, came another in ‘South Shields’ in May. Barely had time to put the white suit away, and it was out on the road again, for us valiant Loonies Nick ‘The Flying Brick’ was well and truly on form again, travelling from Derby up to the ‘North East’ to collect the ten names we need to stand, and did it almost in record time he says. With all the preliminarys taken care of, and a party HQ sorted at ‘The Douglas Vaults Hotel’ the main thrust of our invasion began on Wed 24th April, our leader ‘Howling Laud Hope’ was on hand to appear on TV, Radio and all other media factions, as and when they happened. Nine days of ‘Geordie’ hospitality, what a wonderful bunch of people, but then I should have known, my own parents were from up that way. So a bit rubs of on me I suppose.
Nevertheless all the usual rigmarole, fun and games, went as planned, or unplanned, I suppose is a better way of putting it, you never know who your going to meet, or in most cases ‘what will happen next’.
Lord Toby Jug and Lady Jezebel Luxury-Yacht arrived three days before the count and added fire to the campaign, although both Toby and I were also standing in our own constuencies for our respective County Councils on the same day. (catch up with that in other reports). We met up once again with one of our admirers ‘Nigel Farrage’ always good to see him,and always has a laugh and a joke, and goes out of his way to tell people of the things that we have achieved since our inauguration. We also had a ‘run in’ with Miss Harriet Ha Ha Harman, the Labour Party Deputy Leader, well running in the same High Street that is, we certainly made ouselves known, outshouting her entourage to the delight of some of the locals. She took it quite well, or tried to make out that she did with a smile on her face, but underneath you could hear her crying ‘Go away, Leave us alone’. Well we did, but not before she knew that we were there!
Thurs 2nd May Polling Day, now arrives Mr R.U.Seerius and Lady Hell ‘n’ Back along with our intrepid ‘Flying Brick’ and also ‘Cardinal’ Maximus Bobetsky, all ready and up for the count. The count night always has an auspicious air about it, and this one was of no let down, we came, we saw, we went away with 194 votes.
Maybe the loudest cheer when results were read out,and congratulations all round.
Trouble was — Ukip stole all our votes, but we shall steal ‘em back!
Even so with their sudden upsurge we still managed a nice number of votes, more than some other By-elections. Who is losing them, ask yourselves!
Still a very low turn-out, just over 25%, do you know, it’s quite obvious that the biggest Political Party isn’t any party that we have ever heard of, its the Non-Voting Party.
If all of those voted for us, we would win, the amout of people who said “I dont vote cause I dont trust ‘em” was incredible. We in the Loony Party have a new catch phrase ** If you dont usually vote, then vote unusually, VOTE LOONY**
I would like to thank Stuart and his staff in ‘The Vaults’ for their hospitality, Paul Kelly of the South Shields Gazette for his friendliness and coverage, all the people who voted for us, and all those who didn’t, just for being there. Thankyou all!
Watch out for future dates —- Portsmouth South and Clitheroe maybe!!!!!
The Howling Laud
County Council Election Results
Alan ‘Howling Laud’ Hope —– Fleet - Hampshire 63 Votes
Whopping Lord Foghole — Ilkeston — Derbyshire - 59 Votes
Lord Toby Jug — St Ives — Cambridgeshire -197 Votes
Mad Hatter De Voil — Oxford — Oxfordshire- 38 Votes
Chinners — East Molsey — Surrey -34Votes
Crazy Dave — West Molsey — -Surrey -41 Votes
Andy Winneriss — Lytham St Annes — Lancashire-
Hopping Mad Hog — Eastleigh — Hampshire -29 Votes
Sheikh Me Hand — Sittingbourne — Kent-127 Votes
Mad Mike Young — Isle of Sheppey — Kent -88 Votes
‘Happy Olly Day, — Cannock — Staffordshire - 37 Votes
Lord Bonkers Broughall – Bar Hill - Cambridgeshire- 28 Votes
Crazy Crab – Addlestone —Surrey - 52 Votes
Rumour on the street is that the loony party may get more votes than the Lib Dems. Impossible…. no…we did it with the SDP.. do your remember them?
If we do the credibilty of the coalition will be at stake and may cause the downfall of the Ruling 2 parties..
Dont bother voting UKIP or any one else..they don’t have the Kudos of being beaten by the Loony Party
So tell all your friends in South Shields to get out there and Vote ..Official Monster Raving Loony Party…
Local elections 2013: Why stand for the Monster Raving Loony Party?
In Thursday’s county council elections, most candidates will be hoping for a few hundred votes but one man from Ilkeston will be happy with just two.
And one of them will be his own ballot paper.
He is Whopping Lord Foghole and seeks election to Derbyshire County Council on a Monster Raving Loony Party ticket, in the Ilkeston East division.
Asked what reaction he is getting on the campaign trail he said: “None, I’m disabled. I’m just going down the pub, giving out flyers and hoping the message is passed on.”
Despite taking his name from a competitor in a farting – or crapitation – contest on a Canadian radio comedy in the 1940s, he has some surprisingly sensible ideas.
Lord Foghole, or Jonathan Daniel as he is more commonly known, would like to see money generated in Ilkeston stay in Ilkeston, rather than back to the neighbouring cities of Derby and Nottingham.
And he candidly admits he cannot do anything about immigration or the EU because that’s a government issue.
But, naturally, everything he offers is tinged with his own brand of comedy.
For example, traffic wardens will be renamed valets and will help people park their cars rather than issuing tickets and the mayor will be called Wee Wee Willy Winky.
Of course he knows he stands no chance of winning, but Lord Foghole said he would be interested to find out how much he spent per vote gained compared to the winning candidate.
According to Erewash Borough Council, it is up to the returning officer to decide if a name is acceptable.
It has to be one that is commonly used by the individual and not seen to be maliciously misleading.
In this case, Mr Daniel is known as Whopping Lord Foghole by the Monster Raving Loony Party.
“I’ve not had to put down a deposit, so it’s not cost much. Maybe a bit of printing and some shoe leather – and not much of that because I can’t walk far,” he said.
“At the end of the day I’m doing something a bit different and a bit of fun. I’m looking forward to it.”
There are four other candidates vying for votes in the Ilkeston East division.
Rachel Allen, Lib Dem, said: “The fact that anyone feels they can stand on whatever ticket is good for democracy. It means people are taking an interest in politics.
“Having someone from the Monster Raving Loony Party stops the main political parties taking themselves too seriously and it adds a bit of colour to the event.”
• The Tories denounce Ukip as closet racists, and my experience at byelections and local elections and of meeting many of their grassroots supporters bears this out. Most Ukip members and supporters are nothing but opportunists, seeking a populist platform for their extremist views. As the official party of protest, we Official Monster Raving Loonies strongly object to use of the terms “fruitcakes” and “loonies” when describing Ukip (Tories in disarray over response to Ukip ‘clowns’, 29 April). We who seek the holy grail of Loonyism strongly object to the cavalier use of these terms. In our long-held view, all politicians from all the unofficial loony parties are far too loony even for us Official Loonies, so on Thursday, both in South Shields and in the county council elections, don’t vote Conservative, Labour, Liberal, Ukip or for any other pretenders, vote for the real Official Raving Loony party of the UK. As our late founder Screaming Lord Sutch said: “Vote for insanity … you know it makes sense.”
Lord Toby Jug
Leader, The Official Monster Raving Loony party, Eastern Region
As is tradition, the Official Monster Raving Loony Party will be holding their Victory Party in their Elmbridge HQ, The Poyntz Arms, 85 Walton Road, East Molesey, the evening before the loony landslide takers place on Wednesday 1st May from 8pm
Performing for your entertainment will be MOJO CREW, JOE JAMMER as well as a few other special guests who turn up on the night. The wearing of a hat is strongly encouraged!
Don’t be confused by the other non official loonies standing at this years election, VOTE CRAZY CRAB, CHIUNNERS, CRAZY DAVE or MONKEY for Surrey!
Shadow Minister of Spinning & Bouncing